Living With Dysthymia (Chronic Depression)

I've been under treatment for this episode of major depression for two and a half years now. I feel pretty good, despite how crappy my life generally is right now. I'm stopping one of the medications I'm on (Remeron) because I've gained so much weight that I'm uncomfortable. I'm excited about losing weight. Excited about exercising again. I'd lost interest and motivation for exercise because no matter how much I did, I didn't lose any weight. Of course, exercise isn't all about weight loss -- it's about health. Physical and mental health. Still, it's hard to motivate when you work out hard and stay physically the same, no matter how good you feel mentally. So I'm excited to be excited about exercise again.

For those who don't know, Remeron is an antidepressant that is likely to cause weight gain in a fairly high percentage of people (I think it's about 17%). It's a wonderful medication for people with anorexia or bulemia or for people who tend to lose weight as a result of depression. It's also good for alleviating anxiety and helping with sleep (especially at low doses). I've been on it for nearly two years now. It definitely helped me, but now the side effects (weight gain) are just too much for me.

loss

I received news that a favorite professor from college died recently. I think about him often. He was one of my creative writing professors and a wonderful poet and human being. It's hard for me to think of RB Weber without thinking "hug." He was just that way. Not that he was sappy or anything like that. He was a warm person. He had wonderful blue eyes (like my husband has). I like to visit with him in my memory. There, he'll always be alive and vital.

--Mary